Happy 14th Birthday!!

Dear Em,

Today, 14 years ago, you changed my life.

I know I've told you the story of the day you were born every year on your birthday, and every year I'll tell you again until I'm too old to remember it myself, then you get to tell me.

Last year, I finally showed you your birth tape. I don't know who was more embarassed, you, me or Granny. I know it was hard to watch, but I know one day you'll appreciate the beauty of it all, just like I know how much you'll appreciate seeing how much your dad loved you...especially when he tells you how much ESPN you'll be watching with him :)

You are growing up. I don't like it, I know I can't stop it so I guess I'll just go with it. OMG, your 14! I guess this means you'll start expecting me to treat you like the "grown up" you think turning 14 will make you. Is this the year where I start backing off and letting you make your own decisions, your own mistakes and trusting yourself to make the right choices? How about we start small...like me dropping you off at the mall with your friends and trusting that I don't have to hawk you every minute...LOL, as if :)

I hope you know how very proud I am to be your mother.

Your a smart, beautiful, kind and thoughtful girl. You make me believe that I'm actually doing things right...I know sometimes you'll fall and need help up..I'll be there for you, it's what mom's are supposed to do. I just hope you never fall in the first place, even though I know that's wishful thinking. In a few years you'll graduate and move on to college leaving me here begging you to come home for a visit with promises of doing your laundry and giving you gas money. OMG four years are going to fly by.

I know your dad is in your thoughts daily. I know you carry your dad in your heart where ever you go. I know that you will never forget him and his love for you. Just like I know that you are a stronger person knowing this loss. Do I wish it didn't have to be a hard lesson learned? Absolutely. Seeing you handle the hand you were dealt, has made you a strong girl who can handle anyone and anything that she encounters and this is one of the things that makes me most proud to be your mom.

I know I lean and lean and lean on you for many, many things. You handle my semi-craziness in a very chill manner and for that, I will be forever thankful that you don't know that it only takes two signatures to have me commited :)

Em, I've told you this a thousand times before...you and your sister are the brightest parts of my day, you always will be.

My wish for you:

- Always stay golden.

I hope this 14th birthday is the best birthday yet!! I love you Em, I hope you always remember that.

Love,

Mama