Ok, I mostly make dinner every night so this is no big feat. Tonight, tho, I made 10 minute meal. If your a member of my family (on the Austin side), you know what this is and more specifically who's recipe this is. For those of you who aren't a member of my family, 10 minute meal is a crap ton of shredded potatoes, 2 lbs of hamburger, water every now and again and 1/2 an onion all cooked in an electric skillet. So, basically, homemade hamburger helper.
I was struck by two things while making this tonight (which prompted this post). #1 this is a G'ma Austin recipe (except I don't add carrots for color like she did) and #2 JY used to affectionately (of course) call it 'shit on a plate' because DUH that's what it looks like L.
Two things I can honestly say about 10 minute meal is #1 g'ma it takes LONGER than 10 minuets to make this meal and #2 JY it really does look like shit on a plate by the time I'm done with it....but it tastes soooooo good. If g'ma Austin were here she would frown upon me knowing I used ALREADY shredded STORE BOUGHT potatoes and I did NOT use carrots. Apparently I'm ok with colorless food.
It's no big secret that I didn't have to cook when J was here and found his love of cooking the last couple years of his life. And I know people worried about the girls starving after he was gone, I know I was :) Believe me when I tell you that I became an expert at making mac & cheese, pouring cereal and anything that came out of a can for 10 months following J's death so the girls DID NOT starve.
Then something happened, I started cooking again and I was cooking things that were a part of my married life with J. So when I make something, actually cook, there are so many memories that surface. Sometimes those memories are hard to face...but face them I do and will keep doing - I'm not scared (LOL). Every single thing I have made for dinner in the last 4 months are things that have only been made for my family...my JY family, it's all I've known. Every time I make something I'm assaulted by a memory I'd forgotten or that I'd buried DEEP.
See, I haven't forgotten J, I couldn't even if I wanted to and I don't. Something I recently heard:
You have to sit with the past to walk away from it.
Thanks for checking in.
L
2 comments:
Lesa, I think your Gramma Austin's recipe was a Rockey recipe. I never learned this recipe but I'm going to try it! With the carrots -- I believe in "color". lol
PS: Can I add some shredded cabbage? Is there any leeway here?
Nance I have made it with shredded cabbage but MOM was surprised when I told her as she thought it would never be the same and didn't think she would try it. Lesa ten -minute meal is a Austin comfort food!!!! I am not sure where she got the recipe to begin with.AND I think the carrots were a later addition. Lesa---I am impressed you are really cooking again---good for you!!! I do aagree 10 minutes is not a fair name AND I have used pre shredded potatoes as well,I'm not sure she would not have as well if she had them available and not cost too much. Love Aunt Deb
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