Since that is all I seem to get accomplished lately.
Right now I'm sitting in a hotel room in Marshalltown after another LONG day in the gym at the state gymnastics meet. The girls did an amazing job, once again amazing me to my soul with the things they can do. And I'm not talking the talents they have to throw the skills they have, I'm talking about their amazing strength. It's hard for ME being here remembering the last state meet we were here, with J, I can't imagine what it's like for them. Every BIG thing we do, or small thing for that matter, reminds us that we're doing it without him.
I'm sad tonight because J isn't here to spout off "looks like we're bringing home more hardware" or any other smart assed comment that he was famous for comes up. It's times like these that the missing and the loneliness is the hardest.
J took pride in watching his girls do everything that they do, he got into the drama of missing state champ by 1/10th of a point, he was just a huge cheerleader when it came to the girls. He would also be the first one calling bullsh*t on how long we were at the gym today, I really miss that.
I just can't believe the time that's passed us by. It's been almost 4 months since he's been gone. The pain is still there, it's different, but it's there. The ache in my heart is ever present and getting harder to deal with, but I will do it. No one can do it for me so I just keep taking one day at a time, putting one foot in front of the other and hoping that one day the ache will lessen...good to have goals, I know.
Thanks for checking in.
L
1 comment:
J, the advocate; the protector. The namer of "bullc**p". The fixer and "go to" guy. Moral Support.
The loss of all that . . . that is the super sad part, the bittersweet thing of it all.
But good job, Girl. You did it. One step at a time -- chin up and shoulders back. You did it.
You come from that pioneer stock. You are one strong Austin (Hoyt?) woman.
And congratulations to A & E! Good job!
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