No one ever wants to talk about 'arrangements', but JY was adamant about what he wanted done if he left this earth before me. And no, he didn't write it down but repeated it often enough. He had 2 requests and one of them was full filled tonight.
Request #1 - The End by the Doors to be played at his funeral - check.
Request #2 - Beer and Tacos served in his honor - done.
We had a beer and taco gathering tonight with many friends and relatives (thanks to Aunt Linda for the taco meat and Tana for the fixins). We told super, super stories that I know I've heard a million times before but tonight, hearing these stories from someone other than JY made it different, more special. Special because I can see how many lives JY smiled or joked himself into. I laughed and I cried but honestly, I felt the deep crack in my heart fill a tiny bit. What a comfort to be with so many people that JY made laugh (HARD), made think and people he loved dearly.
A couple of days ago all was right in my world, we were good, we were happy and there was love - strong love. I felt love tonight, love for all of JY's friends who didn't let a little weather deter them from spending a little time reminiscing over a pretty special guy.
After putting the first post out here about the darkness that had befallen us, I had decided to take a break from writing on this site. I have since changed my mind and will continue on, because for me it's healing. If you know me personally you might know that I have a little bit of a problem expressing my feelings with words coming out of my mouth but I have never had a problem with putting my feelings on paper.
Tomorrow is another hard hurdle to jump over with visitation, the day after saying my final good bye to my best friend and the one who made me whole....but right this minute I am at peace and know that even tho JY was missing tonight he was there, he was smiling and maybe even cracking up at some of the crazy stories.
I love you babe and miss you with every beat of my broken heart.
L
1 comment:
Hey. It's me, Sasha. I just wanted you to know I have been thinking about you & Jeff & the kids so much lately. I'm hoping that each day gets easier for you as time goes on. Love you like a sister. Sasha
Post a Comment